It’s that time again for the Tell Us About monthly blogging challenge — and this month, Marsha chose the topic of dreams. If you read my last post about festivals (and why I love the idea of them far more than the reality), you’ll already know that this fun challenge is hosted by a group of bloggers who take turns choosing a topic each month. It’s always interesting to see how differently we all interpret the same word — and dreams is one of those topics that can go in so many directions.
The Dreams That Happen at Night
Because when I think about dreams, I don’t just think about the ones that happen when we’re asleep… although, honestly, mine have always been completely bonkers. I’ve had the classic ones — teeth falling out (why is that such a universal thing?!), falling endlessly, or dreaming that your partner’s been unfaithful… and then waking up in a mood with them as if it actually happened. I don’t really do that anymore, thankfully, but I definitely used to!
But the really vivid ones are the ones that have stuck with me. One of my earliest memories of dreaming, from when I was a child, involved a giant rabbit rescuing me from a terrifying dragon. We escaped through these dark underground caves — it felt so real, so intense, like a full-on film playing in my head. I can still picture it now. So yes, my dream world has always been a bit… dramatic.
The Dreams I Thought I’d Live
But when I really think about dreams, the ones that matter most to me aren’t the ones that happen at night. They’re the ones I carried around with me for years — the quiet hopes about what my life might look like. I always had this idea that I would “make it big”. Not famous big — I’ve never wanted that. The idea of being recognised everywhere sounds like my worst nightmare, if I’m honest. But I did always believe I’d be successful in a financial sense. Comfortable. Secure. Thriving, even.
When I first started writing, I truly believed that one day I’d become a successful author. I imagined my books selling thousands and thousands of copies, reaching readers all over the world, bringing in a steady income. And the reality? Well… I’ve now published over fifteen books, and I earn a few euros a month from them. Yep. A few. It’s a tough industry. Brutal, actually. And unless you get incredibly lucky or have the right connections (or both), it’s very, very hard to turn writing into a proper living.
Then came YouTube. When I started taking my channel more seriously, I thought — this could be it. This could be the thing that finally works. Something that could support the books, maybe even grow into something bigger. And again… reality had other plans. Last month I think I earned about two dollars. If that.
The Ones That Actually Matter
So no, financially speaking, I haven’t “made it big” in any traditional sense. Not even close. But here’s the thing — and this is something I’ve only really come to understand in recent years… I do feel successful. Not in the way I once imagined. Not in the flashy, numbers-driven, bank-balance kind of way. But in quieter, more meaningful moments. When someone leaves a genuinely lovely comment on one of my videos; a reader takes the time to write a thoughtful review of one of my books, or when something I’ve created connects with someone else, even in a small way. That feeling? That counts for a lot. More than I ever expected, actually.
Because those were never the dreams I focused on. I was so caught up in what success was supposed to look like, that I didn’t fully appreciate what I was already building along the way. Do I still have dreams? Of course I do. I think we always will, in one form or another.
Connections and growth
But they’ve shifted. Softened a bit. They’re less about “making it big” now, and more about continuing to create, to share, to connect — and maybe, just maybe, to grow things slowly over time in a way that actually feels aligned. And if one day that does turn into financial success? Amazing. I won’t say no to that. But if it doesn’t… I’m starting to realise that doesn’t mean I’ve failed. It just means the dream changed shape. And honestly? I think I’m okay with that.
Be sure to check out how my fellow co-hosts interpreted this month’s theme. It’s always fascinating to see the different angles everyone takes. You can find their posts here:
- Sally — Sally considers her favorite works of art that relate to dreams and nightmares. Within a World of My Own
- Marsha — Marsha has always had vivid and strange dreams, but she’s had lots of hopes and dreams. Which will she write about? Marsha In The Middle
- Rosie — Rosie talks about some of the dreams she has while asleep. Rosie Amber
- Debbie — Debbie has gone with quotes and songs which feature Dreams as we all need to have dreams and hope for the future, no matter how dire things look at times. Deb’s World
- Leslie — Leslie will be sharing a bit about her daytime dreams and nighttime nightmares. Once Upon a Time Happily Ever After.
